I don't like when I am feeling a certain way, or thinking certain thoughts that I know are immature lol But that's where I am today and I will talk about it here only because I would never want anyone to know that it actually hurt my feelings because it's silly, and the hurt feelings won't last long at all, this much I know from experience.

I took yesterday and today off and really wanted to spend it with my best girlfriend Lee. Yesterday her husband took off work as well and her son was sickly, therefore we did not hang out. I was holding out hope today that I would get to hang out (at least for lunch) but she hasn't called me today at all and it's 3:04PM. I called her earlier and left her a voice mail though. I think what irritates me the most about this situation...is me lol I know full well that the MOMENT she either calls me, messages me on MSN, or sends me an email I will be 100% okay again. But for now, I'm just dissapointed that I didn't get to spend the day with her. Not that we would have done anything magnificent. Probably just went to Burger King then back to the house to watch tv or something like that. If I went over there I know the kids would have had school (they are homeschooled) so I had planned to take my own school work with me to work on it while they did their work. Sometimes I do wish I didn't feel things so strongly. I wish that it was indifference to me if she had called me or not. Although I will say these words, I will only wish I meant them. I will say "Oh it's okay, I knew if you called me we would hang out, and if you didn't call me, no big deal I had some school work to get done anyway" Instead what I want to say is..."I really wish you would have called me today, I wanted to hang out so badly with you even if we did nothing at all. I don't think you understand how much I enjoy spending time with you and the kids" The goofy thing, is that right now I'm incredibly dissapointed that I haven't heard from her, as I said, the moment I do hear from her it was all fade away and I will no longer feel any of it. I wish I could skip to the place where I don't feel any of it *lol*

So for today...I've been pretty bored. Haven't done much at all, haven't seen anybody I actually haven't talked to anybody either *lol* Tuesday nights tends to be our "family nights" to a particular restaurant though (family would include Lee and the fam, and another family in our church, and occasionally a few more random people come trickling in as well) Whether or not that is going on tonight I do not know...I hope so, it would be a great way to end my otherwise boring day =)