I know it is going to appear that this post along with the previous two were posted on the same day, but they were not. A few days seperates each one, but due to some internet issues among other issues, I have posted them on the same day even though they were written on different days.

My supervisor at work, tends to have one person who she adores, and one person that she despises and therefore picks on constantly. I have never been the one she adores, which is fine by me. I have however, been the one she despises. I was until a new girl transfered from another branch and it became her. But she complained about her, and our supervisor got into trouble for treating her so poorly and she apologized to her. Unfortunately, I can feel her gaze shifting back to me. When you are her least favorite, pretty much anything you do is wrong. For instance, she was saying the other day that she has "actually seen somebody writing personal emails with mail to be done sitting on their desk" Um, yeah that was me. However, what she chooses not to see is that I had already ran about 50 pieces of mail (this would mean when somebody mails in a deposit or loan payment) and was going cross eyed so I decided to stop for a minute and email somebody before going back to it. Also, she doesn't see that I NEVER leave mail to be done the next day, where others do. They don't say anything they just set it in the back before they leave and never tell anyone what they've done. Yesterday she decided that she didn't want my jacket hanging from the back of my chair. She didn't say anything to me at all about it, just as she walked by she grabbed my jacket and took it with her and hung it in her office. I didn't say anything to her about it either. I will try very very hard to "turn the other cheek" while she makes me her despised one. It is common knowledge that she always has somebody she hates. Her favorite right now, who we refer to as the "golden child" is somebody that absolutely everybody cannot stand. Nobody quite knows why either, she is just one of those people that you automatically can't stand. She never leaves work on time, if she is supposed to leave at 4PM we're lucky if she's gone when we lock the doors at 5PM. She just fiddles around doing junk...all while getting paid. She calls in late at least once a week and never gets in trouble. I am supposed to be at work at 7:45AM and my boss told me that "this clocking in at 7:46AM and 7:47AM just is NOT going to cut it" Which I do understand the importance of being on time, however since I am the one she is currently despising, I will not ever do anything good enough. So while I am struggling to be extra careful to be perfectly on time, be extra careful that there is absolutely no work to be done before I send an email to somebody...my coworkers are late and playing on Myspace all day long, and texting their friends. Am a jealous? Yeah a little bit I suppose. I prefer to be neither the despised or the Golden Child. I would rather be somewhere in between, flying below the radar. However, I come off probation in March and after that I can post out if any jobs come available. So long as I manage to stay off probation that is. I seem to have a difficult time doing that...once I come off it something happens and I end up right back on it again. I don't want to leave the credit union, but I do want to have a different job.

Okay, so enough about work...

I am 1.5 weeks into my new spiritual diet. I would like to say that things are fantastically wonderful and that church is awesome and all of that. In reality I got up last night and walked out on my pastor because I did not agree with what he was preaching about. He went off on a tangent about how playing poker with the chips will send you to Hell because if you play that, then soon you'll be going to the casino. Yes, I do understand what he was saying...but it was the manner he was expressing it in. He went on for about 15 minutes before I had had enough and went to the bathroom. I was not the only person thoroughly in disagreement with him. Not long after I got up our Youth Leaders wife came in there after me. Towards the end of church I went back out and found 6 or 7 people in the hallway because they did not want to listen to him anymore either. I'm talking Sunday School Teachers, and the person who lead the service was out there too...not just people who come half the time or anything like that. I want to go to church to learn and be taught about the bible. Not to go to bible study to listen to him ramble on about junk. The whole thing came because he heard that another church was playing poker with the chips. He doesn't know that at our Youth Christmas party we played Texas Hold 'em with the chips. We want to go to church and learn about the bible. I want to go and be taught proper ways to pray and reach God, I want to go to church and be encouraged. Last week he said none of us had any business being in the mall because of all the "freaks" and that we should all be in bed by 9PM at night. So...you see what he is doing? He is preaching against things that are riduculous and at no time is he teaching us about the bible. My pastor is 72 years old, and quite honestly, I think it is time he retire. I am getting no teaching at church whatsoever unless our Youth Pastor preaches, and so I have resorted to listening to preaching online. It is the only source of nourishment I am receiving. Our Youth Pastor says the same thing. The problem is...what about the people who aren't quite that dedicated? If the only teaching they are getting is at church, then they aren't getting fed at all.